Hunched over my phone I scrolled through a handful of Instagram comments.  The post was by a woman in leadership and her question had been “Why do women (or you personally) shrink back and make ourselves small?”

Many comments resonated with me.  Reading story after story that echoed my own struggle felt like an injection of courage.  Two seconds of courage resulted in me opening up my blogging platform. Two more seconds of courage and I’d opened this post.

In this life God has offered me an incredible opportunity to hear stories.  Stories from church staff, mission staff, or women who simply attend church.  The stories are infused with discouragement, and frustration. Instead of being a place that values all people, the Church can sometimes be a place that squashes down, belittles, critiques and limits half of the people that God created.

I’ve heard stories from women who were asked to check feelings at the door, or who felt uncomfortable sharing negative feedback for fear of being labeled “bitchy.” Women overlooked because they didn’t fit a specific mold, or whose weaknesses were highlighted causing a battle to maintain confidence.  Does this sound like what God intended for the Church?

One woman vulnerably shared a recent experience in a public forum.  She’d taken off her mask and shared the good and bad story of the church.  Upon reflection a male leader had said very little to her about the risk, the experience, the vulnerability.  He didn’t ask how this had impacted her.  He did offer a critique of one small piece of what she’d shared.  How does this reflect Jesus?

The absolute WORST is the friendly fire.  When there are few women in leadership and they’ve been given a seat at the table, yet they cut down other women.  I imagine it’s done out of insecurity.  The crazy notion of scarcity; that there is only so little room at the table and that we all need to battle for our spot.

It’s utter crap.

We are ALL invited.  God wants each and every one of us there.

I don’t want to debate theology on this.  I know the verses used as weapons to limit the voices of women.  I’ve worked through it and I don’t subscribe.  If you disagree, I’m okay with that.  I don’t want to fight with you.  Because you know what?  There is a seat at the table for you too.  Even if we disagree.

When I read the gospels I read about a Jesus who entrusted the news of his resurrection to women.

1After the Sabbath, at dawn on the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to look at the tomb.

2There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. 3His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. 4The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men.

5The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. 6He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. 7Then go quickly and tell his disciples: ‘He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.’ Now I have told you.”

8So the women hurried away from the tomb, afraid yet filled with joy, and ran to tell his disciples. 9Suddenly Jesus met them. “Greetings,” he said. They came to him, clasped his feet and worshiped him. 10Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me.” Matthew 28:1-10

If Jesus can entrust women with such important news, I am confident that he has other work for us to do.  Jesus has given us a seat at the table.  Will you?

If you’re a leader I’d like to offer you some suggestions.  You may already be doing some of these, some may be new.  It’s going to take work to ensure that females grow and thrive on a team.

1) Make time to listen.  We may not think the same way you do.  We certainly don’t see the world and/or scripture through the same lens.  So please don’t expect women to take a seat and conform to your way of seeing and doing. We need more women at the table because they bring new thoughts, new ideas and new perspective!  Be open to our voice.

2) Spend less time picking apart and more time building up.  This will involve taking risks.  We may not do things right the first time.  Who does?  Make room for mistakes from everyone, male and female.  We are all better when people are given a chance to learn and grow.

3) Don’t wait for the perfect female leader to show up at your door.  Despite what you may believe, great leaders aren’t born.  Great leaders have the initial ingredients to be a leader but it takes time, encouragement, resources, and experience to develop a great leaders.  Look around.  Who do you know that has potential?  Are you willing to invest in her as a leader?

4) Above all else, look at Jesus.  Read through the gospels and pay specific attention to the times that Jesus interacts with women.  He doesn’t negate their voice, he doesn’t demean them, objectify them or criticize them.  Instead he honors them, elevates them and loves them.

Leaders of the church, you have been given a high calling.  God has placed you in authority, entrusted you with all kinds of soon-to-be leaders.  So what are you going to do?  Are you going to encourage them, equip them and point them to Jesus?  Or will you spend more time thinking about yourself and how this impacts you?

Let’s help the Church become a place where women have a legitimate seat at the table.